Finished

This is the finished blanket that I spent the last two years making for my granddaughter Cecilia. She'll be two years old on February 13th. I guess better late than never, right? I found I'm not the seamstress I thought I was when I put the binding on the blanket. That was probably the most difficult part of the entire process. It isn't perfect, but grandma made it with LOTS of love and spent hours and hours doing it. Hope she likes it!

I've now moved on to the one I'm making for the new baby due April 27th. It's not quite as complicated as this one was, but it is my second blanket. I hope my skills binding improve as I finish each one. Even if it doesn't, at least the girls will have something made by grandma to cherish.

Fresh Look

As soon as I can make the time, I'll be updating my blog with a fresh new look custom designed just for me by a dear friend of mine. Thanks so much Willow! It is beautiful and as soon as I can make the time to concentrate and copy and follow instructions, I'll do the update. Hopefully it will be before the weekend is over. Woo hoo ... I have a whole new look coming and it is BEAUTIFUL!

No word on the job and Grandma again!

I've still had no word about the new job. I called on Monday and left a message with the person in the HR department that I had the initial interview with but still nothing. I'm guessing I'm not going to changing jobs anytime soon. So ... I have to resign myself to the job I have now. Hey, at least I have one, right?!

On another note, got a call from my oldest daughter and she's going to have another baby. She's not sure when yet, but after her ultrasound on Friday she should know. She's guessing she's due in July or August. I am getting to be a busy grandma! I finished Ceci's baby blanket. (Good thing as her second birthday is right around the corner.) I've started Chloe's baby blanket. (Due in late April.) And now when I finish that one, I'll have to start on this new baby's blanket. At least it keeps me busy at work at night. I work on the blankets about five or six of the ten hour shift! My right wrist is giving me fits, though. I believe I have carpal tunnel in that wrist pretty bad.

Made a decision tonight. Tim and I are going to San Diego in a couple weeks. Mandi's fiance is graduating from boot camp. Initially, we weren't going to go but we changed our minds. Mandi was a little miffed that we got such a great rate from priceline.com. We'll be flying the same flights she and Tim's parents are flying and staying at the same hotel. We'll have our own rental car, though. I'm looking forward to this little mini-vacation. I think it will be fun.

That's all the news here for now. On the weight loss front, there was none this week. The monthly monster moved in and kept me pretty much the same. There's always this week. LOL

Crazier and crazier

Work is getting more and more crazy. Had to work the evening shift the other day and all I can say is "ick"! One of the girls was going off because she broke off with her boyfriend and he called her a "Ni..er". She was pacing and really wanted to destroy the home, but managed to keep control of herself.

At the same time, another girl decided that staff in general is treating her unfairly, taking her points, and she's tired of it. She started targeting newer staff, charging at them to punch them. She had to be restrained four times. She kicked me in my surgical leg. Thankfully, it didn't hurt. She had on houseshoes and didn't kick very hard. The really bad news is she reported while restrained, she was having flashbacks of past sexual abuse. This means we won't be able to restrain her anymore and she can really hurt someone or herself the next time she goes off. *sigh*

On another note, my program manager made a comment that had me just speechless. She stated she's going to ask the program director if I can be the evening supervisor again when the one who replaced me goes on maternity leave in eleven weeks. Okay, no big surprise there as I knew it would be coming but the rest of the comment is what positively floored me. She said they probably won't be adjusting my salary again. What the hell is up with that? Does she honestly think I'd go back to all that responsibility and headache and make $5000 less? Is she out of her freaking mind? My answer is YES! And I don't want that responsibility again. Was she not listening when I stepped down and gave my reasons for the step-down? It's all just too damn much!

No news yet on the Monday interview. They both seemed so positive at the interviews and now nothing. I really hate the waiting game. I'll never understand why they have to make a person wait and wait, wondering and worrying. Sometimes I feel like they figure you already have a job so no rush. I really want to call, but I'll wait until Monday. The supervisor of the department I'd be working said I'd hear something by the end of the week. I really hate if they don't offer you a job that you have to call them and bug them. What's up with that? Guess today is my day to rant. I could go on about another personal matter involving Mandi (the younger pregnant daughter) but I'm going to leave it be for now. Got to get ready to head off to work soon.

So Sad Really

So I went to work last night and two of our girls have gone to the psych hospital. It's really sad to see them go there. One went because she got physically aggressive, was arrested (a newer staff called the police against policy), sent to the local hospital for a psych evaluation and then admitted to the psych hospital. The really sad thing is the newer staff who called the police had baited the girl which set her off. When things got out of control, she got scared and called the police (something we only do with authorization from supervisory staff which was not obtained). Such a shame really. Other staff stated they tried to handle it but this one staff would not let up.

The other girl went last night before I got there for suicide ideation. For her, it's really all about wanting attention and this being the way she knows how to get it. She's only 13 years old and to know that this is the only way she knows to get attention saddens me. Top it all off with the knowledge that she is creating for herself a record of psych hospital admissions that will never go away is really sad.

They did get my pay worked out. I am now definitely hourly. They figured out what I was underpaid last pay period and have assured me the difference will be in my next paycheck next week. I'm thankful that it's finally settled but they are still cheating me out of money, putting me at an hourly rate that is lower than I should be getting per policy. I don't really have the energy to continue to fight this.

Snow is moving in and I'm worried about making it to my interview on time Monday. I work the overnight the night before. I pray I can get out of the parking lot at work and make it home and then on to the interview. Home is on the way, thankfully. If I'm running late, I'll call and let the HR person know and hopefully she'll be understanding about it.

Everything else is fine. The hubby is well and doing his best right now to take care of himself. I'm doing okay though my eating could be better. I'm working on it and it isn't as horrible as it had been so progress has been made. The scale will tell the tale when I weigh in next week.

Cross your fingers for me about the snow and the interview. It would be nice to be back in a "sane" job, working day shift with weekends off every week, sleeping at night, and just being "normal" for a change. Dream a little dream for me ...

Going Down

I've been pretty sick since Sunday night. I worked my overnight shift and then had to call of on Monday. I was off yesterday and today but have spent a lot of the time sleeping. Got the flu and it hasn't been kind to me at all. The only bright spot of it all is that I managed to drop two more pounds, thanks to the loss of fluids. We'll see if it holds or goes lower next week.

I've done some thinking about lapband surgery. Lately I've been so frustrated with so many things in my life. I'm really just researching and don't feel I'm serious about it, but it's been on my mind. I know realistically that it isn't going to solve any of the problems I'm having but it would sure be nice to get smaller a little more quickly than I have been. Ah well ...

Since I didn't start a new blog with the start of the new year, I did update it. I chose one of the optional templates and redid the stats showing my progress. I felt I didn't need to track the monthly losses from the beginning, so deleted them and just did the losses for the two years I've been at this. I'll continue posting monthly losses as they occur. I was a bit discouraged about only losing 28 pounds last year but the outcome could have been so much worse! I managed to maintain what I had lost in 2005 and then lose a little bit more. No use crying about it. Looking forward and moving on is the only way to proceed.

Have a new job interview on Monday. Gonna be rough because I have to work the overnight shift the night before. I had applied for a job in scheduling in a hospital back in July of last year. They called me yesterday and said they have an opening and wanted to know if I'd be interested. I sure am!

Work is getting really rough. I guess one girl had to be restrained three times yesterday. The girls are getting more and more violent, physically attacking staff, especially the ones they don't like. It's pretty ridiculous to me. I'm so glad that I work while they're sleeping for the most part. I have to help wake them up for school in the mornings but that's about all of the interacting I do right now. I'm pretty thankful for that. I'm ready to move on, if the right job comes along. This one could be it. Fingers are crossed and prayers are being said. If this is meant to be, it will happen.

My new blog

For those of you who are waiting for my new blog, I've put it on hold because I cannot find a template that "fits" me. I found one, but with this new beta version, it kept saying there was an error in the script somewhere. I don't have the patience or time to keep messing with it. I guess I'm destined to keep this one, or to go with a template that's already here. Such a shame when they are so darn plain. Ah well ...

The above reflects my current weight, showing a three pound loss since I resumed my journey one week ago today. I figure that's pretty darn good and am proud of myself. Now the test will be to keep it going.