Happy Halloween

Happy Halloween everyone!

I've gone to two water aerobics classes now and enjoyed both of them so much. I have two different instructors and they each work us so differently. I LOVE that! I've been able to keep up and have even pushed myself to jog faster in the water. It's been kind of freeing.

I'm still doing my walking. I walk to two of the homes each night at work. A couple nights it was chilly and I was tempted to drive but it's such a sense of satisfaction to look at my pedometer and see those steps adding up! I'll walk until it's so cold my face freezes just to keep the energy flowing.

Not much else to report. The scale is just not budging. I'm not worrying about it too much. There are a lot of reasons that could be happening. I'm bouncing up and down between 355-357; for some odd reason my scale likes 357. It does make me a little nuts but I know I'm eating the way I'm supposed to be eating. I've also gone back to drinking at least one protein drink of Carnation with added protein per day in case that is the reason. I wonder if I'm getting enough calories. I think about the pre-op days and the whole "starvation mode" theory. I don't see the surgeon or nutritionist until December. I will attend the support groups in November and see what the others have to say. It's frustrating but I'm hanging in there.

Victories Abound

It's back to water aerobics for me tonight. I don't want to go cuz I know the water is going to be COLD. Add to that the dropping temps here in northern IL and it spells doom. The hubby will make me go though, so no worries.

I had a good non-scale victory today. Last summer before going to Alaska to see my dear friend and sister Teresa from right here on SP, I purchased a bra top for wearing to swim. I never wore it for a couple reasons, but was glad not to because it really didn't fit well. I tried it on this morning to see if I can wear it instead of a sports bra and t-shirt to class tonight and it fit! Woo hoo for me.

Also got some great comments at work last night from a couple people. It made me smile because so many have said nothing. One told me I was going to have to get new pants soon as the ones I had on were baggy. I told her those were my new ones. I just got them a couple weeks ago! Thank goodness they have drawstrings. I guess maybe I'm getting closer to a 3X than I thought.

Lastly, so many told me that my tastes would change following surgery. I didn't really believe them but it must be true. Before surgery, the thought of eating yogurt made me feel sick. Today I ate 3/4 of a light Yoplait yogurt. It was quite tasty. The flavor was raspberry cheesecake and I didn't mind it at all. I have three other flavors to try and am hoping that I will be able to tolerate them all. I know it's a good source of protein and a healthy snack or meal. Interesting side effect of weight loss surgery, changing taste buds. Who would have thunk it? LOL

Got appointments set for mammogram, cardiologist, and three month post-op surgeon appointment. Picked a date for lab work at the end of the month for CBC, complete metabolic panel, and tsh with free T4 tests. Now I just have to keep the appointments.

Have a great week, everyone!

Doctor Appointment Today

Starting weight was 530 lbs three years ago.



Morning of surgery. By my scale I weighed 387.5 lbs.



Just a photo Tim took yesterday. I weighed 355 by the scale at the doctor office today. I've come a LONG way, baby!

I went to my primary doc today. The nurse was amazed at how much weight I've lost. She asked the doctor if I had my surgery already and he said that I had. She said she could really see the weight loss. That was encouraging! The doc told me that I'm doing awesome and that people have the misconception that after gastric bypass surgery they will lose weight quicker but he said that isn't true. He said the reality is that people lose quite a bit the first month and then the weight loss slows for most to about 2-3 lbs per week but it's a steady weight loss. I did feel a little reassured after talking with him. I know that it's best to lose weight slow and steady for many reasons. He also reminded me that I want to be losing fat and not lean muscle and losing slowly is the best way to do that. He said if I continue to lose 2-3 lbs a week I could be at my personal goal of 199 by next Labor Day. Woo hoo! Oh and the doctor scales weighed me today. It wasn't that long ago that they wouldn't weigh me at all!

My Coumadin level was up to 1.7 which is almost in therapeutic range. They want it to be between 2 and 3. The nurse at the clinic increased my dose to 15 mg per day which my doc said is a little high but he agreed with her. He also referred me to cardiology for follow-up at the end of November. How long I stay on this medication is going to depend upon whether or not I have another incident of a-fib so I have to just wait and see.

I have an order for a repeat mammogram because they had nothing to compare the last one to. I have a referral to see the surgeon again, but that appointment isn't for another two months. And a lab order for bloodwork at the end of November to check a bunch of stuff including my thyroid as he said that medication can probably be decreased by then. So that's what happened at the doctor office.

Came home and got some rest. Then up and out to do the laundry. Not much else planned for the night. Going to just chill with Tim and enjoy my night off.

First Week Back at Work

So this has been my first week back at work. All in all, it's been okay. I mean, I have to work, right? And it isn't like the job is all that difficult. I just hate going in at night now. My sleep schedule is all out of whack and I feel like I sleep all the time. Here's what my schedule looks like starting with going into work.

11 PM - 7 AM Work I eat breakfast about 4 AM.
7:45 Am Home and get ready for bed
8 AM In bed and hopefully asleep by 8:30 but sometimes not before 9
1 PM Usually wide awake and ready to get up after being up and down 2-3 times while sleeping to go to the bathroom. Eat something.
6 PM Dinner and meds
7 - 10:15 PM Back to bed.
10:30 PM Leave the house to go back to work and start all over again.

There is just very little time in this schedule for me. I absolutely HATE it. They are opening a new program eventually and I am going to apply for the Program Manager job in that home. It would at least be a daytime position. If Tim doesn't take care of himself this time I'll kick his ass. I'm not staying on this overnight shift forever, no matter how much I love him!

That's my rant about work and husbands today.

Read the one below this one first ...

because I posted twice today.

For quite a while now, like over a year, I have bad days. Days where no matter what, the sun does not shine in my world. They are dark and desolate and I feel so alone. Sounds kind of silly saying that here, where I know I'm NEVER alone. I have so many who check in on me, motivate me, encourage me, and just plain out care about me and how I'm doing. But today is not a good day for me. I feel so lost and I don't know why.

I have walked every day since Tuesday this past week my quarter mile around the track. Today I know I need to go walk. My brain is telling me to walk I'll feel better. My heart just isn't in it today. "I don't want to!" screams my heart. So here I sit in front of the computer. I do know I'm going to the grocery store and today I will not allow myself to take the easy way out and ride on the electric cart. I will walk that store and be glad I did it. Tonight I will be walking from the administration building (where I do the majority of my work) to the homes (where I have to check in and make sure no one is sleeping). It will be a bit chilly here in IL in the middle of the night, but I am going to walk. I vow that right now. I'm not sure of the distance but I think in all it will be at least a quarter mile of walking. I'm also going to turn on the lights in the gym and about every two hours I'm going to get up and go do a lap of walking in the gym. No one else is there to know what I'm doing and I know I'm not going to be able to sit in front of the computer for eight hours so I may as well walk. I'm not feeling all that guilty about not walking today given all of this.

Yesterday I went out for lunch with the hubby. I made what I thought was a good choice. Grilled chicken breast with grilled veggies (green peppers and onions). I left off the potato and bread choices and only ate the above. I don't know if I ate too fast, didn't chew well enough, or something got stuck but man, when I was done (and I only really ate about four bites of the chicken) I had this pain in the middle of my chest. I knew I was in trouble. I've done enough reading to know that. By the time we got to the car, I knew I was in BIG trouble. As I bent down for something I felt like I was going to pass out. Then, it all came right back up. This was my first time vomiting since my gastric bypass surgery. I don't EVER want to repeat that again! (I'm guessing many will say that I will but it's not something I'd want.) Once it was all up and out, I felt fine and life went on as usual. I suppose one could say that was my first ever "dumping" experience. Blah!

I'm going to try to increase my walking to two trips around the path by Wednesday. That's my goal for the week. Oh ... my other goal is get down one more bottle of water per day since I've only been drinking two lately. I found my favorite Walmart brand 'crystal lite' flavor (Cherry Limeade) and that's gonna help since that counts as water. I'll check back to let you know how it goes.

Update

Several have asked in my comments section about my weight loss. I'm a little disappointed in the numbers, though I know I should not be. Having as much weight to lose as I do, I certainly thought it would come off quicker. That said, I do realize my protein isn't as high as it should be nor am I drinking the water I need to be drinking. Those two things are key to weight loss.

When I started this entire process back in July I weighed in at 407 pounds per my scale. On the day of surgery I weighed in at 387.5 pounds. Today I weigh 357 pounds. So I am down 50 pounds since beginning the process back in July; down 30.5 pounds since surgery which was six weeks ago tomorrow. That's an average of five pounds per week which most would be totally happy with. I just thought it would be more. Not beating myself up. I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing and the weight will come off. I will also note I did measurements today and compared them to surgery day and I've dropped ten inches from my body as well. Woo hoo!

I am still walking 1/4 mile on the track per day and with my other steps added in daily I'm walking between 1/2 and 3/4 mile per day. I hope to increase the walking at the track to 1/2 mile by the middle of the week. I'm also going to start water aerobics again next Monday. This week I'm going to attend the gastric bypass support group and the nutrition support group so I don't want to pay for a week I cannot use as those two groups meet on Mon and Wed which is the same as my water class. Increased activity can only improve my weight loss.

I'm feeling fine. I go back to re-test my Coumadin levels Tuesday afternoon. After an increase I'm hoping that things will be getting near where they want them. I want off this drug and am just waiting for them to say I no longer need it. It doesn't make me feel badly. I just know that bleeding is a serious side effect and in my line of work, when I may have to help restrain a kid at a moment's notice or dodge something flying at me, I cannot risk injury right now.

I go back to work tonight for the first time. I'm nervous about going and wondering how I'm going to make it through the night. I also have to figure out the whole how to eat on midnight shift again thing. *sigh* Why can't life be easy, just for once? LOL

CRAP!

Got a call from my primary today. The result of the PT-INR done yesterday was not good. I have dropped from 1.4 to 1.0 and they want me to be at 2.0-3.0. After some thinking I believe it dropped because of my bariatric vitamins. Vitamin K can affect the Coumadin levels and there is 120 mcg of vitamin K in my vitamins. UGH! He increased my Coumadin and I have to go to the clinic on Tuesday to have my level checked again. I just want OFF that stuff, period.

Did my quarter mile walk and the majority of it I was walking aerobic steps which means I was actually burning fat the entire time I was doing that. According to my pedometer that was for at least 11 mins. Wow! In addition to that track walk, I also walked another quarter mile plus today. Slowly but surely I will get there, where ever that is! LOL

I'm Doing Well

Just wanted to let everyone know that I'm doing well. I feel great and am just focusing on getting ready to return to work. Was going to go back yesterday but extended my leave until Sunday. I will definitely go back on Sunday.

I went to the lab today. I was expecting to only have a finger stick to check my Coumadin level (PT-INR test) but the Coumadin clinic did not have an appointment and the lady there said the first test has to be a lab test. She'll call me tomorrow with the results and let me know when my next appointment is. From here on out, she said I should be able to do finger sticks. Thank goodness because my arms look like hell from all the sticks at the hospital.

I went and did my quarter mile walk this morning. It's nice and cool here in IL so I don't mind walking so much. I need to bump up and do half mile but for now the quarter mile is progress for me. I vow to keep that up.

Nothing much else to report but wanted to let everyone know I'm fine.

I'm Home Again

I am home from the hospital. This hospitalization had NOTHING to do with my weight loss surgery per the cardiologist and I'm thankful for that. I had surgery to increase my health, not to make more problems for me. I wasn't scared so much as pissed about having to be there. I went to the surgeon for a check up and end up admitted into the hospital. I had things to do, damn it! Mandi and family were here. We were supposed to go to Alpha at church that night. It was a royal pain in the butt!

I am thankful that the doctor reached for my wrist out of character. I am thankful that I'm going to be just fine. But ... those were the longest five days in my life!

I had three different roommates. Most were friendly but I was in no mood. I had a huge fight with the dietary people who thought I had to have everything chopped to ground hamburger mush and would not give me most of the things I wanted to eat. I eat all of them at home and they are okay for me to have but they wouldn't let me have them. It got ugly to the point I told them I was going on a hunger strike and not eating another meal at the hospital. I mean, come on now. I'm 46 years old and I think I know what I can eat and how to cut it and chew it thoroughly. Debbie talked to my nurse and she called the doctor and I thought it was resolved. Then I tried to order dinner and it was another nightmare. I'm so glad to be home where I can make my own food and eat what I want to eat!

The atrial fibrillation resolved itself. The cardiologist says it may have been caused by stress (which I've been under quite a bit of lately but not said a lot about) or even my sleep apnea, though that diagnosis pisses me off. I did snore a LOT at my sister's last weekend sleeping in her recliner so I suppose that's possible. Now they wait to see if it happens again.

The heparin drip they had me on did something to my blood and my platelet count dropped enough to be a concern. Once they stopped the drip, the count started to rise again.

I had three IVs and all of them eventually blew. The multiple sticks to draw blood have totally ruined the vein in my right elbow bend. The gal from lab told me that. I am bruised up from all the jabs.

I have to go to the coumadin clinic on Thursday to see if my level is where they want it. It was still low but the cardiologist said if I stayed in the hospital it may be another 4-5 days before it was where it needs to be. Good thing he released me because I was about to go stir crazy and was likely the patient from hell the last two days there. I didn't mean to be but everything just got to me. Thankfully, they can do that test for level with a finger stick instead of a blood draw. I'll be on the coumadin for at least 4-6 weeks and then they will re-evaluate and see where we need to go. Fun!

It took so long to discharge me that I ended up having to say something. It really shouldn't take three plus hours to discharge someone from the hospital, in my humble opinion. My nurse had only three patients and that included me. She came on shift at 7 and by 7:30 knew I was going home. She never even came in to see me and check my vitals until 9:30 and then told me it would be three more hours before I could leave. What the ...? I ended up talking to the charge nurse who agreed to help get me out of there. I swear I heard a cheer go up from that crew when I left. Don't get me wrong, most of the time I was there I had excellent care. But the 3-11 shift the night before and then the day shift my last day were just awful. Guess they save the suck crew for the weekend which is just as well. (My apologies to any nurse reading who may be offended. I did not have a good experience with less than a handful of the nursing staff. For the most part they were an attentive, caring, helpful staff who were there to take care of patients and get the job done.)

I go back to work on Wednesday night. I think I'm strong enough. I will work Wednesday and Thursday and then be off for the weekend. I'll give next week a shot and see how it goes. If it's too much, I'll have my doctor write me up a note to do half shifts for a week to ease me back into it. I have to get back to work. I've got bills to pay and a life to live.

I can return to water aerobics a week from today if I feel up to it. I figure I'll see how I feel. I should be able to get back to that now, too.

It's good to be home. I got to sleep in my own bed, on my tummy no less. I had to get up about 4:30 because my back was hurting due to not sleeping like that for so long but it felt good to be sleeping in my own bed on my tummy once again.

Pain and pulling in my abdomen is almost nil. My abdomenal muscles are tight from getting up and down in bed but that's a good thing. Soon, I guess things will be back to normal here, whatever the heck that is!

In the Hospital

The hospital found my clothes from when I had surgery. They had already sent me gift checks for $100 so I purchased me two pair of size 4X drawstring pants and two 4X tops. They had said I could keep the money for the inconvenience. I thought was quite generous.

Tuesday afternoon I went to see my surgeon for my four week follow-up. I had felt a little off kilter since Saturday. I thought I just needed an adjustment in my blood pressure meds. He reached out and took my pulse and it was erratic. He had them do an EKG and it was abnormal. He called my primary doc who said to send me to the ER. Got to the ER and they determined I was in atrial fibrillation (a-fib) and I ended up being admitted. I was put on different medications and as of two nights ago my heart rhythm is back to normal. I am still here because I was placed on Coumadin and they need me to be at a therapeutic level before they release me. Hopefully I'll be out of here tomorrow.

Other than that, I've been doing fine. Eating is going well. No issues per the surgeon. I got to add veggies but by the time I get my protein down, I'm full. Weight loss is 387 down to 359 though the surgeon said 51 pounds. I don't know what number they have as my start number but it must be different than mine.

Kids have gone home. My sister Debbie came back up to help with Tim. She has been a God send and I am so very thankful for her. Without her I don't know what we would do.

Thanks Barb, for letting my friends know what was going on.

I'm Still Searching

I am still searching for a liquid protein that I like. I did try something I got from vitalady.com finally. It was orange flavored. I made orange crystal lite and added half the packet of powder. It was tolerable but oh so sweet. Next time, I'll use the rest of the bag and add it to just water and see how it is.

I got some high protein ice cream recipes from a blog but haven't tried any of them yet. I got an ice cream maker but am still checking out protein powders. I think I'll get me a small bag (7 servings) of the EAS chocolate and see how I like it. I hated the EAS pre-made shake but am willing to give this a shot. Seems what powder tastes good varies from person to person and what we liked before surgery can change. This is a frustrating process to say the least.

I'm feeling pretty well. Almost no pain now. I do get a "stitch" in my left side from time to time I'll be asking the doctor about it on Tuesday when I go for my four week follow-up. And there is still some pulling on the right but it isn't uncomfortable, just annoying. The incisions have all healed except my belly button. That poor belly button now has "love handles" from where they stapled the incision closed. LOL It's the only one that still has scabs and the drain hole is scabbed as well. That one is getting loose on the edges so will likely come off soon. (I hear lap band patients go home with steri-strips.)

I'm walking 1/4 mile at least once a day right now. I know I should be walking more, but for planned exercise that is pretty good for me. I'm working on increasing it to 1/2 mile this next week. I'm also doing more incidental walking so all is good. Hopefully, I'll be able to return to my water aerobics classes in a couple more weeks.

The hospital finally located my clothes. They lost them when I had surgery and until yesterday they were nowhere to be found. They turned up yesterday. The hospital had already sent me $100 to replace them and the gal said I could keep the money. So ... I went online to Woman Within (formerly Lane Bryant) and got some pretty good deals. I ordered a blouse, a sweater, two pair of 4X drawstring pants (planning ahead), and a new pair of bike shorts for the pool as the ones I was wearing are difficult to keep up now. I still have a little money left over so will be getting new socks and probably another bra since my old ones are too baggy for me to wear anymore.

Only other issue is that I've not had a menstrual cycle since August. Should have been here by now and I think that's part of the reason that my weight loss has slowed way down. I've never been regular so I'm not worried. I KNOW there is no way I am pregnant!

I also know it's slow because of not getting enough protein. I've said from the get-go of my weight loss journey that protein is key. It's all going to fall into place, I just have to keep my nose to the grindstone and believe in me.

I'm heading south later this morning. We're going downstate to visit with both of our daughters and the grands. We're all going to go out for dinner together. My sister who was here to help out during surgery is going to join us as well. I'll be taking photos and will post some next week.

Saturday we're going to Newport, IN to an antique auto show. This little bitty town thrives on this event and it's held the first weekend in October for as long as I can remember. To see what all goes on, feel free to do a Google search for Newport Hill Climb. I'll definitely be getting lots of incidental walking there.

We'll be back home on Sunday evening before dark. Tim doesn't want me to drive after dark for some strange reason. I think it's because he doesn't see well himself at night but no biggie. My younger sister (where we'll be staying) has to work Sunday night and will need to rest anyway. And I have to get things ready for Mandi and family as they will be here Monday thru Friday next week. I can't wait!

Have a GREAT weekend, y'all!